If you’re like Amy Koko, author of Ex Wife New Life, the end of your divorce may have caused some serious financial confusion. There are attorneys who, unfortunately, don’t assist their clients and prepare them for their financial future properly.

If that’s you, do you remember what it was like trying to adjust your life to your new financial situation? (We know some people don’t need to adjust at all, but that isn’t always the case.) You may have had to cut back on your groceries, your gym membership, clothes for your children, etc. It can be a serious challenge that you may not have been prepared for.

Koko states that for women (or men) living on alimony, there are two things they’ll need to understand. The obvious is the financial planning element: knowing your situation and adjusting your spending accordingly. The other less obvious barrier is coming to terms with the fact that you still financially depend on someone you’re no longer married to and probably don’t love anymore.

All financial plans and settlements are different, and it’s important to have a firm understanding of your finances as they are currently and as they’ll be in the future. Divorce is confusing enough, and you don’t need money to be another form of confusion.

Remember: alimony is taxable! Some women, like Amy Koko, find this out the hard way. If your ex was doing your taxes throughout the marriage, it might be quite overwhelming to try to tackle them yourself now that you’re divorced or separated. We usually recommend working with a financial advisor at least the first year on your own to make sure you’re on track.

Koko also provides an interesting outlook on being financially dependent as a divorcee. She states that if a company employed you and financially and you were dependent upon that company for 30 years, you’d have no problem leaving with a great financial package (i.e.- retirement). That’s how you can look at alimony: you earned it.